23 things I learned while I was 22..

I would like to start out by saying, Thank you. If you're taking the time to read this, it means a lot to me. I haven't given this "blog" much explanation but I hope to get around to that soon.

For now, here is a fun list I put together of 

23 things I learned while I was 22.

1.) No boy is worth THAT many tears.

I say this after spending 6+ months crying over a guy I can't even 

stand the thought of today. He's wasn't worth it. they never will be. 
Men are not worth the tears so save them for things like, videos of 
 baby animals and the end of La La Land.

2.) Just do what makes you happy. 

We're constantly judged by people who have no real right to judge our lives.

 Don't take their judgment to heart and just do what makes you happy. 

Wear what you want to wear, go where you want to go, date who you want to date, 

because in the end you're the one who had to live your life and if you live it 

trying to please anyone but yourself, you're going to have a few of regrets.

3.) Living alone is equal parts terrifying and liberating.

Enough said..

4.) Don't break the bank to follow trends. 

I've been guilty of this for years but at 22 it started making sense to...
dare I say, care less?
Everything you buy this season is going to be "last season" eventually.
I've found it much more rewarding to buy nice pieces that will last
several season, rather than the 'must haves' of the current mood.

5.) It is so important to prioritize your spending.
Soo.. I've NEVER been good at this but it's been an important

change I've had to make in the last 364 days.

6.) If you're unhappy at a job. LEAVE.

Of everything I've learned this year, this was a no-brainer.
I was working a job where I felt outcast, unappreciated and
all around miserable every. single. day. It took them letting me go
to realize just how much I hated being there and I've honestly 
been grateful every day since. 
My happiness does NOT have a dollar value.

7.) Your words are worth speaking.

In this case, typing.
I worked with a man (shout out to Robert Reeder),
who suggested I start a blog after seeing a post I shared of myself singing and
playing the ukulele. I have since adopted the idea and plan to continue blogging.
But more than that, he said that if you have an opinion you should share it,
as there may be others who agree, or just care to hear what you have to say.
(Thanks Robert)

8.) You're allowed to not care..

I find this especially true in large group settings where
someone else is taking control. Let them, if shit goes wrong it's not your fault.
(I mean.. do you really care if it does anyways?)
Now, this isn't to say 'throw your hands up and let someone else
do the dirty work'. You should work your hardest but when you
have the opportunity to care the least, do yourself a favor and take it.
Plus, it's not always your job to care, and anyone that gets 
upset with you for being honest about not caring, has never
been honest with themselves about what they truly care about.

9.) Surround yourself with good friends.

This is the one lesson I've held closest to. Life is too short to have shitty friends.
If someone cares about you, they're going to make an effort to stay in your life.
 Don't try to hold on to people who don't care; and don't let people walk on you
to remain "friends". Lastly, a true friendship contributes to your life. If you realize
that a friendship is toxic, it's well worth your time and peace of mind to 
just let that friendship go.

10.) Roll with the punches.

Let's face the facts. 
I've never been "the chillest" when it comes to unexpected
 situations, especially when there could be a negative outcome. 
But learning to take the hits as they come, has helped to
 keep my stress levels low and my outlook positive. 

11.) Build up other women.

Living in a city I didn't grow up in has made making friends hard.
Earlier in my 22nd year, I signed up for "girlfriend" apps. 
I've made some of the greatest friends I'll ever have out of 
complete strangers from the Internet. I've found that most 
women are just looking for REAL, quality friendships and
someone they can trust. I've built these friendships by building
up my lady friends and loving them despite their flaws while helping
them to shine a light on what makes them truly beautiful.

12.) Not "having time" is really just poor prioritizing.

This was a little bit of a mind-f**k for me.
The reality is, if you're not making something a priority,
you can't claim its because you "don't have time".
Time is money, spend it wisely.

13.) You're not a victim. You're the hero.

As soon as you come to this realization, it changes a lot about
the way you view the world. An old saying I've heard is "don't say 
'why me', say 'try me'". Life isn't fair, so grab it by the horns and 
get what you can out of it.

14.) Take the compliment.
In this case, I'm talking about actual compliments, you have no
obligation to respond to cat-callers on the street. But when someone 
gives you a genuine compliment, be gracious, they clearly think well
of you and you deserve to take their compliment without remorse. 

15.) Everyone plays the game of life differently.

So don't hold it against someone if they don't play by your rules.
It's not all about YOU anyways. Accept people as they are, if
you can't live with their views, move along. There are plenty 
of people in the world who will agree with you if it matters that much.

16.) Stay curious.

Keep learning, keep growing, because you'll never know
everything. Don't be afraid to ask questions. Pick people's 
brains. Dig deep in your searching and don't feel wrong for 
doing so. Aid others in their curiosities as well. 

17.) Don't take anyone's shit.

Too many times I've witnessed or been victim to 
uncomfortable situations, that could have been avoided.
For example: Catcalling or inappropriate comments from men.
My recent responses have been vocal, direct and reasonable.
Just yesterday I was leaving my apartment when a man (far too
old for me) asked if I would go on a date with him. I smiled and 
promptly responded "I don't think that's appropriate". You shouldn't 
feel, since you're a woman, that you can't demand respect and it
is not your job to be a people pleaser. 
Don't be rude, but don't take shit.

18.) Allow yourself to be a beginner.

I've never really been afraid of starting at the bottom, but I have
realized in my 22nd year, that a lot of people are. I've accepted that
there are subjects and fields I will know very little, to nothing-at-all 
about. And I'm okay with starting from the bottom to learn and
celebrate even the smallest successes.

19.) If you don't challenge yourself, you're already dead.

Life is ALL ABOUT challenges and if you're not challenging 
yourself, the "Universe" is going to do it for you. You can pick
your battles or let them come to you, but making the choice to 
take on a challenge will get you further than sitting and waiting
for the challenges to come to you.

20.) Your mom is right about everything.

No, but actually though..

21.) Drinking isn't really 'my thing'.

This one tends to strike up a lot of questions,
but I've decided, at 22, that drinking just isn't for me.
There's no previous abuse that forced me to this conclusion,
I've just learned that I don't like hang-overs or spending 
$8 on a single drink (that's like 10 packs of
ramen noodles). No thank you, sir.

22.) Never let anyone, EVER, dull your sparkle.

Okay, OKAY! You caught me..
I learned this long before I was 22. But it has by far, been 
my favorite lesson I've had the pleasure of learning. 

23.) All good things must come to an end.

The placement might seem a bit ironic but this lesson
holds true. You can't taste the sweet without also tasting
the bitter. What goes up, must come down. And you can't 
be 22 forever. But when one good thing ends, another,
even better thing will surely take its place. So forget the 
fear of that rising age and know that something better is 
sure to fill your next year. 






Thanks for reading.
I would love to hear your feedback on this blog and others. 
feel free to leave a comment with your thoughts, or other blog ideas.

Love Always,
Bethany